why self

you know God says we as humans really believe in self preservation ,and he keeps telling me that he is the only one who can preserve us from destruction, so i ask my self what keeps me from letting go it all boils down to trust. you know even children have the need to preserve. just as we begin to learn to walk if we fall or begin to we try to protect our selves from harm when all we have to do is reach out and trust in the hand of God to protect just as we rely on our parents to be there we must rely on Jesus we must trust the unseen hand. it's the unseen that scares me even though i know i have nothing to fear,why is that? is it because we fear as humans what we cant see we feel it has to be tangible if you can feel it touch it or taste if your five senses cant fix it or come in contact with it we fear it.if we don't understand it we run from it, if we cant grasp it we toss it aside.if it doesn't benefit us we don't want it even if it does we push it aside because we feel we know best we let self in the way, why is that i ask? why do i let little silly things in and bother me as if they were life threatening why do i behave the way i do ? i ask myself this a lot and all i can come up with is self i let self become to all important. now that i see the problem how do i fix this do i keep trying myself or do i let go really let go get rid of the safety nets and jump into the unknown head first no parachute no human life lines that I've put there and let god do what he is best at? sherry's feelings my feelings of me first or why me or my lack or capability of letting someone else namely the great I am taking full control of my life i say i want change it is time for it i have lived in self long enough i am not the fixer God is the fixer i am his legs arms eyes ears mouth but what i have forgotten is i am not my own and it isn't my job to fix everything and everyone isn't out to get me and it isn't there trust i need or my need to trust them i just need to trust the one and only one who matters and that is Jesus that is god the father the great I am i can either let go now or watch the rope break of human self preservation . i choose once and for all to let go to let God take full control it's the only choice the right choice. so God here is my written declaration i here by let go of self of pride and the me ,me attitude, i here by let go of all lives pains and disappointments, i let go of criticism , i let go of anger, bitterness, i let go of the desire to be boss, i let go of self indulgence, i let go of worry, worry for tomorrow, let go of worry for today, let go of worry for finance, i let go of self. God i need you to take control of me and change me from the inside my dependence is on you. so help me father to be what you have created me for just as Jesus gave you all i must do the same it is the only choice for me . do or die i must crucify self forever to the cross and i do this gladly. so good by self hello Jesus. take control heavenly Father change is pain full and even more so when self is involved but here i am and here it is . help me to not help myself but allow you to help me. wake up , look up , and get up to where my God is. amen